Bahajir

بهاجر

Moody furry Monday's dog miss of the week??
Originally uploaded by bulldog1.

حبيت واحد بس ما حبني

حبيت واحد بس ما درى عني

حبيت واحد بس ما يازله شكلي

حبيت واحد بس ماعجبه اسمي ولا رصيدي

حبني واحد بس ماترس عيني

حبني واحد بس تشرط علي

حبني واحد من غيرته خنقني

حبني واحد بس أمه ارفضتني

حبينا بعض بس انظلونا وافترقنا

حبينا بعض بس أهلنا ما رضوا عنا

حبينا بعض بس دمنا ما طبق

حبينا بعض بس الموت أخذه في ليلة عرسي

تزوجت واحد بس اخذ غيري

تزوجت واحد بس خاني في ليلة عرسي

تزوجت واحد بس طلع زطي

تزوجت واحد يحب الحداق أكثر مني

تطلقت من واحد لأنه وسواسي

تطلقت من واحد لأنه عافني

تطلقت من واحد لأنه ريحته ماعجبتني

تطلقت من واحد لأنه بيده طقني وبريله رفسني

يا ناس يا عالم ويش أسوي

الناس مو راضيه تهدني بروحي

مو عاجبهم لا عزوبييتي ولا حبي

لا زواجي ولا طلاقي

ياناس خلوني أعيش بريحاتي

تري فيزتي جاهزه

باكر أطقها سفره

وما تشوفون رقعة وجهي أبد في ديرتي

**************

On a lighter note, enjoy this menage-a-trois

The Kiss
Originally uploaded by creativity+.

What do you want from life?

Do we have to want something from life?

If one didn’t know what he wanted, does this mean he’s lost?

Does this mean that he needs therapy?

This was an argument I had today with my friend who searched the entire directory looking for a shrink.

Dr. Foziya dree3: is not available.

“Something” clinic: the doctor answered the phone instead of a secretary and when asked for guidance he said that he’s just a counselor and that she can be referred to mustashfa el 6ib el nafsi for drugs.

NLP/mantra (not so sure) at AlRazi clinic: she is on vacation.

Dr. Marwan AlMutawa: the number listed in the paper is the number of a restaurant! So my friend called el baddala who gave her his house telephone number. The housekeeper answered and told her that Marwan no longer has an office!

Dr. “Something” (who deals with Jin): the secretary said “I don’t know I will ask and call you back”.

Why finding a healer/therapist/ or whatever is this hard here?

*******************************************

6abakh diaries

6abakh visited us at work today. This is the conversation that took place after saying our hellos:

6abakh: enta sawi 3aroos?

Me: la.

6abakh: laish? Ana kilyom wallah sawwi do3a’ 3ashan enta sawi 3aroos.. wallah ana 3ala tool enta fakkar.. Kil yom..

Bas allah mako yisma3.

He then felt guilty for saying such thing about God, licked his fingers and then tweaked his ears; their way for asking for forgiveness.

Flickr is blocked!

yannaw estakhaffaw!!! min sijhom?!!?!?

:E

minus zero

bah

bah
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

29/6/2006

اليوم عيد

اليوم يوم تاريخي

صج ان الجو حار جدا والمكان كان فوضى والعديد من الحريم الكبار استائوا ورجعو البيت بدون تصويت

بس حسيت بشعور غريب جديد أول ما حطيت الورقة بالصندوق

سعاده لم أتوقعها، على الرغم من اني لم أكن مقتنعة تماما بمن اخترت لكن العوض ولا القطيعه

حسيت أني انجزت شيء عود

شعور حلو وكأنه شعور بالانتصار

كنت مجهزة الكاميرا لتأريخ هذا الحدث ولكن شدة الحر التي تسيح البدن وخوفي من اعتراض بعض الحريم اللواتي لا تحب الظهور بالصور منعني من ذلك

أمي ذهبت منذ الصباح الباكر ولم يكن هناك أية تنظيم، انتظرت طويلا حتى خرجت بدون تصويت

ولكن حين جاء دوري ظهرا اعتقد بأن احد النساء تبرعت بتوزيع أرقام لتنظيم الدخول بدل من حجز أقرب كرسي للباب

كل الخبه من عشرات البنات المطشرين منذ أن خرجت من سيارتي وحتى داخل المدرسه، والله لو أحد المرشحين حتي ولو كنت مو ناويه أعطيه صوتي بس كان امفكر انه يولي البنات التنظيم بدل من اللزقه وتوزيع كروت المرشحين

لزقه وحنه ودعله ويدي انترست بالكروت المكرره

والكل كان ضايع مو عارفين شنسوي ووين نقعد

في ناس طافهم الدور وهم مايدرون ان في ارقام

جزا الله خير احد الشرطة الذي ارشدني

المهم

وانا في احد صفوف الانتظار، دخلت امراة بنقابها ولفت بنص الصف لفه قطرها متر ونص وهي تردد و تقول:

"الصوت امانة، الصوت امانه، الصوت أمانه"

اليوم كان عيد، وبس ناقصنا البخور والقهوة

حتى شكلي اهتميت فيه أكثر من كل يوم وكويت ملابسي بروحي

:P

With regards to my new template, I felt like I wanted to change and found nothing better that fits my current attitude towards the current events. I was planning to remove it today after the elections, but I think I’m gonna keep it for a while, maybe till I know the results.

And to those who can’t believe that it’s me, it is me. You can never know a person whole heartedly through a blog. And never ever judge by appearances.

That’s my tip for today, see you all later.

Who Killed Her?

I wanted to keep her teeth; they always fascinated me, but my aunt wouldn't let me
I remember when she used to scare me off by moving them in her mouth
I remember getting scared but laughing at the same time

She was Marry Poppins with kubbat buqul in her pocket
She always kept a spare sandwich in her big black bag in case anyone got hungry

When my little cousin knew she passed away, he said "why her? she was my best grandmother" and when my nephew knew, he asked "who killed her?"

I didn't feel like she was really gone until the ambulance took her body
at that moment, I felt the real meaning of "Goodbye"
I was saying goodbye to someone I will never see again, whether dead or alive

It was the first time I see a dead body
It was the same face, same expression
Nothing looked different, except that she was lying quite

One of her eyelids was a bit open and I felt her looking at me
No one knows what happens in the dead world, except dead people
One said that she was there listening to us; the other ridiculed her
I didn't know what to think
I felt blank

All I knew that I had to look at her face, a face I won't see again
Memories popped in, thoughts of death, I even imagined myself lying in her place
Who would be around me?
Will I be old or young?
Lying because of sickness, or an accident
People warned before my death, or a sudden death
Crying for me, or for the thought of death
Some may cry, you think it's for you, but deep inside, you just triggered an old emotion or a future thought

When we're alone, we talk as if it's just another day
But when people come, they hug you, pinch you with their mustache, wet your cheek with their saliva, and willingly make you want to cry
Like everything I do, I need to have perfect settings and mood for crying
My lenses felt dry, my chest felt pressured
I sip a cup of tea
I watch the play of a funeral
I remain in a state of shock
Unaware of how I should feel

Obssessed Psycho

I've got lots to say, but so little time. Most importantly is that my friend's husband is back NIYAHAHA. Second, I think that Dr. Fawziya Duree3 should join the parliament. Third, I'm suddenly interested in politics. Forth, I'm always late, and it's always time for the buffet; a thing that disgusts me. The sight of hungry women filling up their dishes and the thought that the discussion should be stopped for the poor hungry women who have been "here since eight". I still don't know who to vote for. I have made one choise only, can I double click him?


I'm madly in love with slippers. There are so many lovely ones, so many that they all fit.


I saw Foad AlHashim at Boots.


I am impressed by some Kuwaiti women.


يجب منع الأطفال من الذهاب للمقار الانتخابية
كان أمامي فتاة تبلغ من العمر حوالي 8
تصفق مع الناس وتيبب
ثم تستحي وتخبئي رأسها بحضن أختها الكبرى والتي تبلغ حوالي 12
أختها كانت تأكل البنك وترمي بالقشور على الأرض
وكلتاهما كانتا لابستان كعب عالى بو 10 و20 سم


بعض الأمهات يجبرن بناتهن للذهاب للمقار الانتخابية لازدياد فرص الزواج




Obssessed Psycho



I see people, remember bloggers, believe that it's them. Smile or talk to them. Go home believing that it's them till I know that they aren't.


I saw Samboose and Misscosmo at a wedding. I spent the whole time thinking of a way to say hello. But after I asked A3sab if they were there, I knew that they weren't and that I had imaged the whole scenario.


I see Don alot. But when I come close to the bike, it turns out that it's the Pizza hut delivery guy. Sorry Don, but my sunglasses aren't medicated.


Today, I saw Jewaira. We had Manicure and Pedicure together. But I still don't know if it was her or not.


Ok.. time to hit the sac and stop making a fool of myself.


What do you do when you want to sleep, but you need to blog? But you really need to sleep?


I blog, rest my laptop beside my pillow, wait for the first comment on my new post. Read it and smile (supposedly) then sleep.


This is one of the posts that I would definitely feel like deleting first thing in the morning.


WARNING:
G & A
Don't ever discuss my posts with me. Pretend that you don't read me.

Get Me Out of Here

We went to the parking lot and sat in her tiny sized car to see some things she got me. She was almost screaming while talking to me. Her voice was loud, she was excited over nothing, add to that how close we were in her small car.

I kept asking her to lower her voice a hundred times without any use. "This is the way we talk at home" she kept telling me.

This girl is the manager’s secretary. If you just listen to the way she answers the phone when it rings, you wouldn't believe that she's the same person sitting in front of me. She felt proud that talking out loud is the way they talk at home.

"But this isn't the way you say your aleeeeew (Alo) on the phone! How come you're so much different on the phone?!"

"Oh hahaha you see, it's kind of fashla (shameful) incase the caller was a man".

"But it's not just your tone of voice; it's also the femininity and delicacy you speak with!"

"Oh hehehehe.." Again feeling proud and confident... "Yes, incase the caller turns out to be a man".

*****************

As we walked back to the office, she noticed my slippers (n3al naydiyya) and couldn't help but say that X & Y (who are my closest friends at work) used to mock Z (a colleague) behind her back for wearing such slippers. (ya3ni eshqasdich?)

Her veil falls over her shoulders and she starts complaining, so I advise her to use a pin for support.

"What? I am not Persian" She announces.

(No comment!)



There are two new previous posts, please don't ignore them :P

Memoirs of a Single Girl (8)

Friday 2nd June,2006
I got an SMS from my friend telling me to get ready for Sunday to have lunch together. The message seemed like an "order" and not an "invitation"; It was an early plan and I had no obligations.

Sat 3rd June, 2006
I got a call from her at night telling me that she's in the area. We met at the closest cafe and chatted. We didn't have much to talk about. Her life is still and there are no happenings. We have different intellect and nothing in common to share or to discuss except reminiscing and mourning over past events. Her older son was coming back and forth from Kentucky Fried Chicken and her younger son was sucking a lollypop. "So when's your husband leaving?" I asked and it turned out that he had already left this morning.
"No wonder she reserved me since Friday... No wonder we met at the cafe; a thing we haven't done in almost a year" I thought to myself.

"You know what? It's a good thing that you don't have any single girl's diseases! You know like what my other 4 friends have. You see one suffers from tender breasts and the others have hormonal imbalance and as the doctor told them it's all because of the fact that they are still single; all will vanish once they get married".

"Thanks for the info you rude, insensitive &%$&&@&*@#$%" I thought to myself.
I went back home feeling very depressed over some memories that I forgot long time ago, but kept remembering whenever I saw her since she's always been the listener.



Sunday 4th June, 2006
I pushed myself to go to our promised lunch together. Thank God a mutual friend called and joined in; a party of girls never hurts.

Monday 5th June, 2006
I was getting ready for a reception when she called saying that she's in the area (AGAIN)... (Am I being stalked?) She wanted to meet AGAIN; good thing I had a valid excuse.


I feel used. I feel suffocated. I am neither her hubby nor his substitute. I am a Libran ruled by Venus. I don't commit to girls.

I am a blogger. I love my blogger friends. I appreciate and VALUE the friends I made from blogspot.com. I enjoy their company so much that I no longer enjoy the company of my old friends. I found the people I match with. It's only history that makes me keep my old friendships. They don't understand me, and I don't understand them either.

I get heart ache. I get stomach ache. I get short breath and my temper shortens.

We live in different worlds.


too tired to edit the post...
umm, there's a previous post... please don't ignore it.


Category: Spiced up reality.

Message in a Book

My friend got a gift from her boyfriend called "How to Walk in High Heels". It's about different information that vary from changing a tire or mood to getting out of a car in short skirt... burn a CD and not the toast and such helpful daily life tips.

The thing is that my friend feels OFFENDED although her boyfriend is just a friend; no love or chemistry what so ever.

So I want to know what you people think of this gift. Should she or shouldn't she feel offended. Is there a hidden message in offering such a gift? Or is it mere innocence?

Note: While looking for the book online, I found this site about how to walk in high heels!

Can You Read This?

I received this by email:

ONLY 55% Of PPL CAN READ THIS

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55% of plepoe can.i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!


if you can raed tihs forwrad it.

So can you?

I Never Liked Dishdasha

More Shananiganz 013 (Large)
Originally uploaded by wings_n_fins.

But I think I've changed my mind.

Boots

I just received a sms saying that Boots has opened in Souk Sharg.


YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS

I won't go to work tomorrow, batrayyag o batghadda oo bat3asha ehnak.

Crack Crack

I am disappointed in (some bloggers)
ماني قايله منو وليش
and no, it's not you

"When The People Spoke"
is a HILARIOUS, sarcastic film
عورني بطني من الضحك
بس يفشل وسواد وجه لنا ولا أتمنى عرضه بالخارج
I will talk more about it when I have the time

I am disappointed at work
(I am not chosen)

ليش ما أعرف أقشر الحب عدل؟
Why do I have to use my hands to get to the core?
Yes, my colleagues عادوني واكتشفت انهم اهم المتهنين بحياتهم الوظيفية
عيزت وأنا أحاول اني أطلع صوت عالي عند تقشير الحب
Just to get back at them for their noise
ما أقدر أشتغل من الازعاج

الحب المصري لذيذ
أنا ويني عنه من زمان

My current mission:
To know how to crack الحب with a higher sound than my colleagues.

My colleague just gave me a gift that consists of (Electric Sparklers) and (Bomb Bag). I told him that I have fear of fire works and that I don't need it. I wonder how he's gotten through our security gate. Hmmm, I don't know what he's thinking. Blowing me up? Or the whole building?

I need a new job. But I don't know what I want to be.

ليش يسمون الي يشتغل
حمار مكده؟
I really need to know... and no, it's not me but another who's كاسره خاطري actually.

bashar ya bashar

hobla
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

I used to see this insect in cartoons only... and a few days back I saw it in real and let it crawl on my hand. I loved it. Really cute and friendly.

Hi

I miss you all

oo

I miss me

The thief

من حفر حفرة لأخيه وقع فيه

لدي دولاب بالمكتب احفظ فيه اشيائي الثمينة كالآلة الحاسبة وأشيائي الخاصة كمعدات تنظيف مثل ديتول

تعرضت لسرقة كريم يد جديد قبل فتره حيث أن عمال التنظيف لديهم هوس بهذه المستحضرات فلم تكن تلك أول مره

ومن يومها بدأت بالحرص على قفل الدولاب مع انتهاء الدوام وحفظ المفتاح في جرار صغير

ولم يسلم دولابي من السرقة مره أخرى

وفي آخر مره قررت اخفاء المفتاح في مقلمة مملوءه بالدبابيس

خطة ذكية لجرح اصبع السارق

ولكن كما يقول المثل

من حفر حفرة لأخيه وقع فيه

جرحت نفسي عدة مرات

والآن

اني ابحث عن طريقة اخرى اخبيء فيها المفتاح

وانتقم بها من السارق

بدل الاتنقام من نفسي

Intoxicated

Intoxicated by accent, captivated by height

Spontaneous, flirtatious

Lively and fun

Everyday, please do come




No, this is not an add :p

Mango's Vitrina

mango
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

What ideas does this photo give you?

Boots

boots
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

AT LAST! Will be opening soon at Marina Mall and Kuwait Airport.


YESSSSSSSSSSSSS

Big Foot

shoes
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

Size 9 and 10 at Topshop! For the first time in Kuwait (as far as I know), wide fit too.

I felt wonderfully petite when I tried them on ;)

Correction:
Papillona says that those shoes belong to Evans and not Topshop. Now it makes sense!

Memoirs of a Single Girl (7)

مذكرات عانس 7

مابي عيال

عانس: يمه، أنا قررت إني ما أييب عيال

أم عانس: أنتي تزوجي أول وبعدين قرري إنك ماتييبين

عانس: لا يمه صج، أنا إذا تزوجت ماراح أييب عيال

أم عانس: وكأن الرياييل ألحين سطره على الباب

عانس: يمه !

أم عانس: انزين انزين، وليش ما تبين عيال ؟

عانس: لأني إذا انخطبت الشهر الياي، وملكت الشهر الي وراه، وتزوجت الشهر الي ورا الي وراه، معناته اني راح أحمل عقب خمس أشهر، وأولد السنة اليايه، يعني راح يكون عمري 31 و4 أشهر وأسبوعين وخمس أيام، وأنا الصراحة مالي خلق أربي مراهق إذا صار عمري نص قرن !

أم عانس: كا آنا عمري 60 وليلحين قاعده أربيك !

عانس: يمه !!

عانس: يمه قاعده أكلمك جد !

أم عانس: حتى أنا قاعده أكلمك جد، بس أووش خليني أسمع زافين شيقول

عانس: يمه، ليش ولائك للبنان أكثر من الكويت ؟

أم عانس: أنا تربيت في...................... بحمدون...................صيفت ............. انخطبت.................تزوجت..............بحمدون......

.................بحمدون.............. بحمدون.............

أم عانس صكت رأس عانس بقصة بحمدون إلي ماتخلص فقامت

أم عانس: إشفيك ؟ وين رايحه ؟ قعدي ما خلصت القصة !

عانس: رايحه أشوف التلفزيون في داري

أم عانس: شنو بتشوفين؟

عانس: قناة فيلكا

وذهبت

وبعد ساعه، جاء أبو عانس من الجمعيه شاري خبز إيراني ونخي وباجيلا

أم عانس: بوعانس بوعانس، عفيه، طلعلي قناة فيلكا ! هذه غنائيه أم إخبارية ؟

مذكرات عانس (6)

Memoirs of a Single Girl (6)

مذكرات عانس (6)

العروسة

أستغل إنشغال زينب بتحضير وجبة العشاء

وأذهب إلى غرفة إبنتها هاله البالغة من العمر الستة سنوات

أخطف عروستها الممددة على فراشها

أختبئ خلف المنضدة

أشمها

وأمشط شعرها

أغير ملابسها

وأضمها إلى صدري

ثم أغفو غفوة تنسيني مجريات الدنيا من حولي

جنان، جنان، زينب تناديني

أنتفض من مكاني

وبسرعة رود رنر؛

ألقي العروسة على الفراش

أخرج من غرفة هالة

وأعود إلى زينب وكأن شيئا لم يحدث

آكل العشاء حبة حبة؛

خوفا من اكتشاف هاله؛

تغيير ملابس عروستها

مذكرات عانس (5)

Photokina Qandahar

Together forever

In love and in war

Surrender to my love

Click here to see more

Wolfdogs

Meet Yoshe and Makwa, they are awesome.

Why Does Junk Email Target Men Only?

Every morning Flamingoliya goes to work, she checks her work-related inbox. All what she finds is email about one product but with different subject lines. No matter how many times she blocks the sender, new accounts are created. Subject lines vary between:


Increase your sexual desire
Medicines before Valentine Day!!!
Medicines for real men!!!
Men Health
She wants a better sex? All you need's here!
Super Viagra (Cialis)
Viagra Soft Tabs
Want your love back?? Check it out!
We cure any disease!
Why seek? Choose any love pi11 you want!


One more email that doesn't belong to the category is global investment house with their daily or weekly market report.


Flamingoliya's manager sometimes asks her to check for certain emails he's been notified with from clients and she claims that she hasn't seen them. But when she checks her deleted junk email, she finds them. Some times she manages to hide the fact that she’s deleted them, but many times she couldn’t.

***********************

A secret admirer visited Flamingoliya today. Her art work was praised. Flamingoliya felt happy that her work didn't go in vain. She appreciated the visit and now can't help but smile. Her endorphin production rose.

***********************

Flamingoliya is on a diet. Her mom keeps asking her about how many galleries her food contains. While her co-worker keeps asking how many categories.

Is the word calorie that difficult?

***********************

It is awkward when you like someone and that someone or that someone’s close relative proposes to a person very close to you.

What are the odds?

***********************

I apologize for not replying to comments, but be sure that I will. madri eshfeeni, I have to be in a certain mood to be able to.

hmf

hmf
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

I Am Fake

Memoirs of a single girl is fiction
I am married woman with two kids
I've been fantasizing about being single
and my wish is coming true in a matter of days
I hate my husband and I am getting a divorce.

I’m sorry if I fooled anyone
But if you read my blog description it says a spiced up reality.

I am making a divorce party and everyone is invited to congratulate me.

The Meeting

I had a business meeting at some place <<< extreme excitement.
When I first entered the building; I tripped <<< extreme embarrassment.
The cute guy turned out to be a very close relative to one of my co-worker-enemies << bummer.
The not so cute guy was the one who I caught looking at me <<< another bummer.
On my way out, my co-worker warned me to watch my step <<< I thought he forgot that I tripped.


Today’s resolution: to throw all my high heels.

e hehe

Photo 52
Originally uploaded by queerdood.

Check out this fun creative photo stream!

No More Bengali Dreams

What would you feel if you were married with a kid and an old lady comes and asks you:

”How come your baby is beautiful when you and your husband aren't?”

A punch in the face would do. Good thing I wasn’t around.


*************

6abakh is leaving, his contract expired.

He told me:Flamingoliya, (enta lamma zawwaz, saaw telephone ana)
“Call me when you get married” and handed me his telephone number.

Meskeen, kasra kha6ra wayid *Gulp*

*************

Many times colleagues joke about clients who turn out to be my family members. I enjoy seeing the shock on their face when I tell them who they are ;)

My Day

I had a bad day. Nothing unusual really, I'm used to bad days. In the morning a colleague sat beside me and started talking and talking and talking. She gave me a head ache. I can't take too much talk first thing in the morning especially before having my coffee. I ignored her by occupying myself with the computer but that didn't work. I just felt like screaming.

Had a religious discussion with another colleague and decided not discuss religion with anyone ever!

The talkative colleague came again with another friend and started talking and talking and talking about marriage. I had another discussion about marriage that I decided not to interfere with ever again either. Topics like settling down for someone who she doesn't think is perfect for her, incase no one asked her for marriage later on. Another topic like her family mocking her fiancé for his level of education or his family's social status when in reality the mocking family isn't any better. Lots and lots of topics that raised my blood pressure.

In the afternoon, I got rejected from a kind of group which really shocked me and made me depressed. I had shopping to do, a shop called me twice insisting that I come see their new collection. But when I went there I found none. The salesperson told me: " Sorry maam, we have another Flam, I got mixed". It was no time for me to forgive so she became the victim of today's frustration. Then I went to the next shop that belonged to the same company, I had a receipt and wanted to buy something. I saw a bag and I swear that all the time I was looking at it the salesperson would not stop saying:" It's very nice, nice model" tens of times even when I changed bags! I wanted to scream but instead I left the shop without buying anything to let her regret forcing me to buy the bag. Yes forcing, I think this company teaches it's sales persons how to insist and pressurize customers instead of selling.

That's when Broke called me, and saved me from an absolute heart attack. At home, I found out that the shoes I bought which were so comfortable at the shop, were so tight at home. Don't ask me why. Thank God this shop refunds. I don't want anymore receipts.

I have a head ache and I need to sleep.

Oh and one more thing, my sister keeps mocking my writing in this blog. So I tell her that it's just a blog and I can write whatever I want and that if I wrote any better, I would be publishing. I just miss the days when I wrote freely without anyone judging me. She doesn't like my language.

My cousin recently discovered my ID and she hasn't been herself since. Wonder why, maybe she's in shock?

They don't think that I look like what I write.

Have you seen the big THING that Meedas sells? It's in the ads everywhere. It looks like a big huggable bean bag in colorful shades. I need one right now.

Foziya Drei3 Tidbits

1. Caller: "My girlfriend cheats on me with my friend. I asked her why? She said because he gives me what you cannot give me. Dr. Foziya, I love her I want to marry her".

Dr.: "She's materialistic. Love sometimes fools you".

2. Caller: "Marrah marrah big".

Dr.: "This program is censored and family friendly".

The Exorcism of Emily Rose

My review on the film: SCARY

EKHARRI3

Is it real?! A real story?!

I know it says it's real, BUT IS IT?

How am I going to bed tonight? :(

Blog Awards

بتحبو مين؟

حبيبتكو مين؟

Ok, so I restrained myself from making a campaign..

But now since the time has come..

BLOGGERS I PLEAD THEE

I am nominated for two awards..

Queen of the Blogosphere

and

Most Romantic Blog

So if you think I deserve any

An email from you to the bloggers in charge

To their inbox go barge

Flamingoliya is the queen of blogs at large

FINAL REMINDER TO CAST YOUR VOTES

Also

don't forget to vote for the Kuwait Single Girls Society

(Kuwaiti Cosmopolitan) for the best joint blog!

March 21

الى أبي وأمي مع التحية

أغراضي مبعثره
أرففي مغبرة
غرفتي نتنة كالمقبرة

ملابسي محذوفة
أريكتي مدفونة
أحذية رخيصة بالية
وأخرى غالية بعلبها محفوظه

أنام حتى الزوال
لعملي أنطلق كالفرسان
وفي الفريج أسابق الصبيان

أنا لست كما أردت
فمن المطبخ أنفر
ومن النار أرتعد
وبمفهوم ربة البيت أكفر

لست بطباخة ماهرة مثلك
ولست بفاتنة للرجال كما كنت

ليس الرجال كأبي يا أمي
بشرة جافة كجلد ثعبان
جسم ممتلىء كجسم نعمان
هذا مكان وذاك زمان

زمن الصدق والوفاء والعمل الجاد قد زال
أسرح وأعوم في البراري والوديان
ولا أجد مكان
سوى حضنك الدفيان
وظل أبي المشبع بالحنان

الاهى لاتحرمني من هذا الجمال
فوحدي أكون كالجبان
وقودي هو اهتمامكم
وعسى الله أن يقدرني على رعايتكم

Marriage is..

Marriage
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

(your comments please)

It doesn't make any sense

How could a man admire a woman for years and asks her for marriage when he's never spoken to her?

Dessert للمتزوجين فقط

I was shopping at the perfume store when this product caught my attention. It's a body spray that can be used for hair too. As we all know, regular perfumes cause white hair.

So as I was checking it out, the salesperson asked me: (to be read in Egyptian accent)

انتي متجوزه؟

انا: لا

She had a grin on her face with her eyes looking down. I waited for her to say something but she didn't. So I asked:

ليش يعني؟ اشعلاقة العطر بكوني متزوجه أو لا؟

All I had in mind was that the perfume could be seductive. But what makes it so special? I mean, aren't most perfumes supposed to be so? She paused, thinking of what to say, grinned again and said:

هو يعني اكس-سز-يوز-مي يعني

Her tone raised and said:

هو لل

I won't say it. You figure it out.

(I still can't figure out why she said it loudly since she was acting polite)

So I said:

صج؟ شلون؟ ما فيه كحول؟؟

هي: لا، دووئييه

(Taste it)

أنا: لا

هي: دوئيييه

She insisted

أنا: لا

هي: طب دوئيييييه

أنا: لا مابي

Pronounced firmly.

She showed me two different flavors. One was chocolate, and the other was vanilla and caramel. It's glittery too. I took the body/hair spray only and she kept convincing me to get the other (eatable) products like lotions.

No, thanks maam, I said. But that didn't matter. She wouldn't stop until I told her:

لما أتزوج، أييلكم

She grinned again.

I was wondering for long about the relationship between the spray and it's brand name desert. Is it for stinky people living in hot areas for example? It's made in the USA and it's not that hot there; till I realized that it's deSSert not DeSert.

When I Was One

my life had only just begun..

At The Dentist

My last 3 dentist visits, 3 different doctors..

1. I had an operation and the suction machine stopped working. The dentist left me sinking in my fluids till he fixed it.

2. The dentist had finished working with my teeth and I was feeling dizzy waiting for him to pamper me and let the chair automatically rise.
The chair stopped working and I had to get up by myself. I leaned forward to gargle, and there was no water. The water tap stopped working too!
My dentist was totally stunned, and blamed my fortune.

3. I was watching my dentist carving my temporary tooth. My tooth fell down and the dentist asked me to stop looking at him!

Gubbisa

People call me gubbisa. Why? Because when I go out, cars park behind my car although I always park in the right places. And when I’m at restaurants the waiter either brings me the wrong dish, or I find hair in my dish.


It’s always me!

Stupid Ringing Tune

Remember this lady? Wow, it's been a year.

Her current ringing tune is Right here waiting for Richard Marx. This song is one of my favorites and has a special place in my heart since it was the first english song I learned by heart during my first teenage years.

Anyway, NOW I started to hate it, and I don't want that! Whenever this tone plays AT WORK it means that her hubby is calling. Awwalan, khalisat el aghani for her to choose my fave?

Thaniyan, why would she use this particular song for her hubby? I mean she's not gonna "be right here waiting for" him!!!!

This is the kind of pathetic romance that I don't like :P

Maybe you'd say: entay shako feeha?

Well, ana akoo! She's my neighbor, we're not in good terms, and we don't speak, that's why.

Men In Disguise

I was out yesterday when I saw three girls who attracted my attention. I stared at them and found out that they were guys. Their clothes, makeup, walk, long hair, hair dye, hairdo, red jacket, fur, big breasts, handbags, everything in them was girly except of course their manly faces that can never be changed.
DAMN, they didn’t even have facial hair.

Dear Signature,

What do I do when I receive a letter that I have to reply to when It doesn't have a name; only a signature!!!!
It happens alot at work! and It's stupid. Imagine me calling him and asking: can you tell me your name please? or: Who are you?

Play

مسرحية كليله ودمنه لسليمان البسام في ميدان حولي اليوم

انا معجبه فيه وايد

تتوقعون يرضى اتصور معاه؟

7ayatee

الحياة ليس لها معنى بدون حبيب
حتى الأكل ليس له طعم بدون حبيب
الأيام تمر بسرعه
والعمر يضيع

ماذا أنجزت؟

شهادة مدفونه في دولابي
عمل بعيد عن تخصصي ، روتيني
وان أخطأت، لاموني

دوام يبدأ قبل طلوع الفجر
مفارقة فراشي والحرب مع ذاتي
استعجال، عدم تسخين السيارة
ازدحام، فوضى

تمر ساعات وكأنها أيام

مقعد اشتكى من ثقلي المتزايد
مكتب وفوضى
شوكولاته وحلوى
قهوة تركية
وصديقة هندية

كاسبر وطاووس
نعنع وكابوس
مجاعة أشعر بها، ومعدة أسحق بها
مكالمة هاتفية، مجاملة ودية
همس وغزل، ليس له من نصيبي محل

معجب فيني اعتقدته، صديقتي كانت هدفه
سوالف، حش، ضحك وغش
واحده تبكي زوجها، الأخرى عائمة بصوت خطيبها
ابني نجح، ابنتي بلغت
فستق (أخضر) وحب
بنك وترمس وبصل

بصل فواح يؤكل
وبصل بالديو يقتل

كمبيوتر جديد لها
ولابتوب خفيف له
طابعة سريعة وملونه

لأناس لا يعرفون حتى معنى الحرفنه
سفره ودوره

وغدوه بره

الدنيا تدور من حولي
وأنا متجمدة في مكاني
لا حول ولا قوة
تبلد في المشاعر
الشيب يغزو شعري
الفئران تأكل بقية نثاري
طاعون
وباء
جنون
وتمرد في الأعضاء

أفكر وأحتار

زمن يئدون البنت وهي صبية
أم زمن أضغط فيه على (انتر) وأحضى بالحب كهديه

الحب هدية موقوته

I Can See a Rainbow

Here's the rainbow ya Delicate. I know it's not that clear, that's why I didn't post it earlier. But guess what? This was my best shot!



Thank you Broke :)

Life Backwards

Life Backwards
Originally uploaded by flamingoliya.

What do you think?

Year 2006 Valentines Report

1. I'm single.
2. This picture (click click) resembles my mood in the morning.
3. I had a depressive talk with my friend who was pmsing about valentines and my mood radically changed to this:

4. I had to do something special. My friend wanted me to visit her, and I didn't want that on this day. So I decided to bond with my nephew.
5. I fed him mushroom soap for dinner (he's 2 and it was my first time, shame on me). I found out that he's a mushroom lover just like his aunt (me). I sacrificed the very few mushroom slices in the soap for him (I don't usually do that). I felt weak for his (abi masloom) request.

-HE POOPED.
6. We watched Tom & Jerry. He didn't let me watch Oprah (Opla), although he likes her show.
7. We spent sometime reading flip flop books. I made sure like always that he recognizes flamingos. Only this time I didn't find the flamingo's flip flop head. Bird flue maybe?

-HE POOPED.
8. We went to my room, sat on my bed, played old mcdonald's song and danced.
9. I chatted with Salty. He enjoyed the fish background and wanted to hold the fish so bad (I need a screen cleaner now). He liked MSN winks. Whenever I changed the window, he said (abi sautti abi sautti.. sautti hilwa).
10. He ate my raisins, and chocolates.
11. He almost ate my pink silly putty thinking it's strawberry :/

12. I stamped his hands.
13. HE FARTED. It smelt so bad that I thought he pooped.
14. We hugged and kissed.
15. I spent quality time for the first time and found out how a great kid he is.
16. The feeling was mutual, cos for the first time he didn't want to leave :)
17. This is my impression now:

On a side note. I don't believe in celebrating Valentines. Love must be celebrated everyday. But when I see the whole world celebrating it. When I see the lovely chocolates, red hearts, teddy bears, and all Valentines specials in the markets, it appeals to me. So in the end, it seems to be a celebration of goodies mostly enjoyed by merchants. I have to admit though that this celebration brought me close to my nephew.

oo Tisbi7oon 3ala 7ob, 3ala golat Dr. Fawziya Duree' :)

Waish Asawi?

شفتك وبطأت علشان ما أدعم وأنت يمي
يات وحده مستعيله وبالتترك عمت عيني
قلت أحقرها لأنها ما همتني
البنت إطلعت مستعيلة وظلت بالهرن ترقعني
ليما بقت تدعمني
يا ناس قولولي ويش أسوي
أتدوده وأدعم إذا شفته
وإلا أدودهم ويدعموني
تراها فشيله جدام المارين صوبي
سيارتي تسكربت بسبة واحد


بشوفته لمني

الجزء الأول

Love Kuwait?

Scared Expat?
Originally uploaded by I Love Q8.

Don't speed!

A public note: add such messages to your cars, much more useful than love notes, trademarks, football teams, and your nicknames or emails!!

What Would Muhammad Do?

What Would Muhammad Do? (click here to view source)
By IBRAHIM HOOPER
Published: Feb 7, 2006

We all, Muslims and people of other faiths, seem to be locked into a downward spiral of mutual mistrust and hostility based on self-perpetuating stereotypes.

As Muslims, we need to take a step back and ask ourselves, "What would the Prophet Muhammad do?"

Muslims are taught the tradition of the woman who would regularly throw trash on the prophet as he walked down a particular path. The prophet never responded in kind to the woman's abuse. Instead, when she one day failed to attack him, he went to her home to inquire about her condition.…

When he returned to Mecca after years of exile and personal attacks, he did not take revenge on the people of the city, but instead offered a general amnesty. … These are the examples that Muslims should follow as they express justifiable concern at the publication of the cartoons that were viewed as intentional attacks on the prophet.

This unfortunate episode can be used as a learning opportunity for people of all faiths who sincerely wish to know more about Islam and Muslims. It can also be viewed as a "teaching moment" for Muslims who want to exemplify the prophet's teachings through the example of their good character and dignified behavior in the face of provocation and abuse.

As the Quran states: "It may well be that God will bring about love (and friendship) between you and those with whom you are now at odds." (60:7)

My Inner Devil

Thank you Nunu

I don't do tags. But I found this one interesting cos I love drawing. I am tagging everyone reading this post.

Lurpack Cow

وصلني هذا التعقيب على بوستي السابق





صج ما فيكم خير يا عيالي

أنا الي رضعتكم وانتوا يهال
أنا الي رويت ظمأكم لما خلص حليب أمكم

تقاطعوني جذي؟





مالت عليكم





أنا وصديقاتي كلنا زعلانين منكم
ومتبرين منكم لي يوم الدين

يورز
المدللة سابقا
بقرة لورباك